It’s So Lame When a Punter Talks Trash

When does trash talking by a NFL player cross the line between being harsh to just being ridiculed? When it’s said by your punter. It’s like someone inhaling pure helium and then trying to say “I hope you die m****fucker! Die!” How seriously can you take that? You’d laugh.

There are two people on the field that should never talk trash. The punter and the kicker. First, they are usually the smallest guys on the field. Secondly, while the rest of the team is hitting in pads during practice, these two are working on their kicking. When the team is dying and sweating in the heat, they’re still working on kicking. Sounds like a day by the pool.

The Indianapolis Colts and the Jacksonville Jaguars played another hard fought divisional game in which the Colts won thanks to some ridiculous personal foul penalties by the Jaguars. Indianapolis punter Hunter Smith took a shot at the Jaguars comparing the team to a stand-up comedian.

“Jacksonville is like a stand-up comic who can only use vulgarity and curse words because he lacks intelligence and lacks class,” Smith told the Indianapolis Star. “He really doesn’t have anything to say. Our intangible is our class and our intelligence. A team that gets personal fouls the way they do, the roughing penalties, they just don’t have any material.”

I suppose when you’re the punter for the Colts you have plenty of time during the game to think of a good line. A statement like that coming from a (holding back laughter) punter just shows how stupid it sounds. So does he say the Colts are Bill Crosby and the Jaguars are someone like Dane Cook? Give me fucking Dane Cook, who’s the hottest comic out there now. Bill Cosby is….where is Bill these days? J-e-l-l-o?

Jaguars coach Jack Del Rio is the worst when it comes to memorable quotes. He comes from the school of “coach speak” and old football cliches. I could answer his press conferences for him. He hesitated to respond (naturally) but jokingly took a stab at what Mike Vanderjadt famously said before,

“It must be something with the kickers over there.”

Huh..hmm..oh..is Jack done with his press conference? If I were the coach I would have said something like “It must be hard to be a transvestite in the NFL. Congrats on being the first.” Then I’d be fined $10,000 by the NFL. Much better though right?

Just don’t forget Hunter Smith on punt coverages you’re fair game. Finally Hunter Smith go fuck yourself. Yeah I don’t have much to say so and that’s the first thing that came to my head.